Archangel Chamuel came to me the other night, as I actually sobbed in my bed for the very first time, since I was a child.

“Alariel/Alura, why the tears? We heard you from above. Dear one, why are you sobbing?” She looked puzzled as to why I would sob, and after all of this time too. I think the last time that I cried like that, was when I was 14 years old over a situation where I couldn’t take anymore abuse from others. I had been bullied most of my life, outcasted, and even raped. My mother had issues (although better now), and I seemed to have no one but heaven in my corner. The angels always comforted me, but what about someone here? I don’t think I had ever felt so hopeless to be honest with you. there was no one else like me, or who could understand. It was a very secluded life while still trying to be with others, whom I had to pretend to have the same interests with. I am usually optimistic, knowing how things will turn out, I trust the heavens in what they say and shake off obstacles  in having the reassurance of a solution to come in the future, for any tribulation. Still though, I feel that the sobbing, was my way of releasing all of the hurt and disappointment that I had felt in the world, in people, and in myself for being only one person. I wanted to change everything. But I could change things one day at time, one soul at a time. I loved people. I didn’t want to wait.

“Master Chamuel, I am sobbing because of all of the hurtful things going on right now around me. Never have I given so much love to people. They don’t have to listen to me, but because they didn’t, they will learn the hard way when it comes to others or situations. In their lives, in friendships, and in love. I wonder why, after much time of proving myself, and showing unconditional kindness and love,  people still side with the plotters and schemers, why do they turn on me, and why don’t they love themselves enough to avoid negative situations? It pains me. I have so much opposition in my life now, and as much as I have been there, I feel so alone right now. Even if….there are many surrounding me in support still. Some, simply due to disagreements in opinions, target me, plotting to hurt me revengefully.  I know when something is going on, and I see beyond the masks Master Chamuel. But yet, it is hard to combat these things, without love of others. “

“Alariel, listen to the guidance of heavens. I was not asking the cause of your sobbing.  We already know the cause. I was inquiring as to why you felt a need to cry at all? The answers are so evident in your life. You and I both know that. Not only this, but the world is a scary place. It is one, that trust does not exist anymore.”

I did know this… I wondered why, but deep down I already knew why. I often wonder why the bad people in the world go without punishment or consequence some times, but the good ones are the ones who pay for no crimes at all. Is it really up for any human to decide who I am? What I am meant to do? I ask myself this often. She turned to me and said:

“You and I both know, that those who speak truth, who work for the higher good, they are the ones prohibted from doing so. Don’t let it bring you down. Know that in that world, humans will always do what suits them first, and this is why they continue to move further and further from the light. Was it not said?….in dire times that  people would call to heaven, but heaven would say that they did not know them? Humans only love the heavens or need us, when they need something. Instead of loving us always. Why would you expect any thing different? I know what pains your heart, and it is because the world is becoming more and more cold, callous, and deceptive, and in that… you are seeing the effects of this as truth is suppressed, and people rise up against one another, even those who are pure at heart and innocent of any wronging.   In truth, you know what the right thing to do is, but yet your heart sometimes is too good to do it. This is why I had asked why you are sobbing…if you already have the answer…?”

“Lady Master Chamuel, I do know, but it hurts me to have to. This means that I will have to say many good byes, to people, places, and things. The heavens always taught me to be unconditional, and I thought that this meant to give love limitlessly. There were times that I had to stop communicating with people, but still loved them. They took it personally and I get visions of plots, vindictiveness etc. Also, I know that my facebook, Youtube, and Social media pages are being limited from reach. There are some who are a part of it. I only had hoped to meet real people, who had similar mind’s and hearts. I let people so close.”

“Alariel, listen, change is needed. You may have to walk away from some things, and even from some people, but in the long run, it may be for the higher good. Follow heaven as you always do, dry your eyes, calm your heart, and know that all things are for a reason pointing toward a new opening doorway.”

With that, I felt love fill me with comfort. She was right.  The world has changed, and I am the same. The heaven loving people that I went seeking for to illuminate and teach, now are gone. Corrupt in the ways of the world, enarmored with the teachings of life that make it easy to do whatever, and feel okay with it at the end of the day. But how many truly do feel okay with it? Other people compete, steal my work, and maliciously plot behind my back, in spirituality. How is that higher self, or divine? Maybe the world wants darkness? In this I know…for every human who seeks enjoyment from the other side, will always come seeking back for the light once that darkness consumes their existence. And will I still be here, but will I be the same?

Clearing and Renewing:

“Sometimes, as an angel or otherworldly soul types, we tend to accept far too many things. With us, there is a lot of love but no judgment. It is evident, that we do not have negative opinions about people, but we do see the truth and speak it. Just like the creator, we can embrace situations and people into our lives openly, but even the creator lets a person or situation go, if the person or situation isn’t seeking change. With the creator, the love is always there, the will for the person or situation to always get better, is always there. The unconditional quality is always with them from above. It’s been the same with me. For many many years in my life, from childhood all the way up, I have always excepted people no matter what I could see in them. Even at times when I knew that I would be hurt, I still invited them into my life in order to show them something better or just give them the love that they did not have which was causing them to be the way that they were. To be honest with you, it has worked about 65% of the time. But there is still that large percentage of when it didn’t work. Still I hung on. Speaking with the Creator and with Archangel Chamuel, I have learned that sometimes it’s best to just clear your life if change is not coming. Sometimes you have to make room for the change.

Recently in light of many different situations that are going on, I have made the conscious decision to let go of all of the anchors that are holding me back, as well as negativity… even if I do still feel love. Hopefully, this will help me to get to the next step. Maybe it will have a valuable lesson with it, for others too. I have been a friend when I should had been only a teacher. I emotionally attached and connected, when I should had simply stayed on the outside to help.  I thought that this is what people loved about me, but it seems that it may be better, (the Creator told me on Sunday) that as an oracle, I should go back to being in that seclusion that I had when I was smaller. While I cried about it back then, it shows me now, that it is better to remain protected in being alone, with heaven to surround me only.  Even in trying to find love, I found a situation that interconnected into a bigger issue. It was full of mental abuse, emotional abuse, control, monitoring and pain. People have the ability to hide beyond the disguise of a smile, to mirror themselves to be all that you had been looking for in a friend, or in love. Even when I cry out that I can see beyond the mask and the projected illusion, the comforting voice  mirrored of my loving way, is given to me, that makes me long for the denial to be true. Wouldn’t you? If you only ever encountered loneliness, and in the things that you had seen were false projections from others who would only come to hurt you? And I can say that in the many, many people that I have come across in my personal life, 80% of them have hurt me. It leaves no room for faith in people, although I still try to see the light in them…and I do see some. So please, open your heart and do not blame me if I wanted to believe the lies, that I was loved in return or that the plots that I could see, were imagined. Do I subject myself to being hurt later from dismissing my own visions to believe the lies in order to be loved even if falsely? Yes. I do. I know that.

With the situation or people being as it is in this world,  I have to let go.  I’m just talking about life in general. So I don’t know how many people are with me on this, but since there is a nice healing meditation on my Youtube,I am going to use that to clear the inner stuff. I am also cleansing my body and my soul, as well as my life. I’m going to purge all negative things, places and people, but I will always still carry that love and divine will to want to help. Don’t be like me, and bring toxic situations and people into your life, simply out of a wanting to give love to others who may be ficticious because they lack it themselves. Sometimes, there is not enough love to fix someone, until they are ready. You can’t bring those things into your life, out of needing love yourself either. I am not insecure, just unconditional, and I deserve a true friend too you know? So do you. Life is supposed to bring happiness, true relationships, and progress. not stagnation, not hurt, and not falsehoods in others.Whether you contribute to adding issues to your own life or not, for whatever reason, isn’t time to start new?

Nevertheless, take some time to think about your life and the people in it too. Maybe it’s time to just step away for a little bit from people, places, and things that may be creating negativity in your life and the lives of others directly. Its time to make better choices, all around. Look at the Source directly, and not for surface value. Clear out, even maybe negative situations that you have created for yourself?… So for my #makeoverchallenge that I am hosting in my group “Spiritually Awkward”  I will not just be changing my outer appearance as I had thought to do… but it will be a make over on my life. I hope that I motivate you to do the same.

I will always be here for anybody who needs me. But I am going to remove myself from situations to where, people only see what is right in front of them, and not the things within them that I see. Because I saw goodness, a potential for change, possibility for a better way. They see self advantage. Self advantage will cause ambition and motive in anyone, and i have been used for insight, learning, and all types of things. Even love, when a person did not receive it in their lives, but did not have in them to give it in return. Those who are capable of hurting the good, to backlash them, gossip, plot, or even be vindictive even over small misunderstandings, are people who can hurt anyone, even themselves. Always safeguard yourself. I didn’t. But I am now.